Christmas has always been a very special season for me... not just because i get to send myself into shopping sprees, or the gifts given and taken but also because it never fails to remind me that this season is the reason for our relatives to reunite which doesn't happen on the other normal/not-so-normal days of the year. when i was a kid, my mom would usually bring us to the province to spend christmas and new year there, those years have always been special and somewhat magical for me,never really knew how in the world the whole Castro clan get to know each other's names and happenings for the year that had passed when we barely see everyone around until Christmas, and text messaging not available for those happy times. Christmas was the most anticipated time of the year for us cousins, because back then, we would form groups for dancing and singing then soon will be the awaiting of special awards to those who've prepared better or who perfomed and brought the house down. Those were the days of AQUA, Backstreet Boys, Donna Cruz and the craziest, (for a lack of a better term)groups around. Soon after, us kids (back then) would go to our richest tito's and tita's trying to be impressive on our own *sneaky ways, for aguinaldos were like greater medals than praises for us back then.
As I go back the golden lane, I can't help but smile about them but whenever I remember how my Tita Carmen would cry alone, unnoticed for the lost of her 2 sons, sadness and pity fills my happy heart. She lost both of them days or months before Christmas, gifts she would never appreciate even as years go by. We would mourn silently, and unknown to her and with her, they were special kids. Jj and JR.Two of the most handsome kids in the family, talented, very happy kids. I never knew what God's reasons of taking them from us were, specially from their Mom, but as they have always said, (our elders) they've gone to a better place and God has His own special reason from taking them away.
Now, we had another death in the family, this time my Tita Baby's son, this is years after those very happy years of reunions. It was a sad rendezvous for all of us, the most of us were there, but not with our happy anticipations and expectations on meeting in such a bitter end.Not anticipating anymore on the Aguinaldos the richest tito /tita would give, dances and songs not as happy as before but more like a hollow chant of mourning. Kuya Arby has always been a great kid, never too loud, and has always been welcoming in his quiet way. It's too bad being there at that exact moment, days before Christmas, unable to have helped him when he was living in his rocky predicaments. But there are a lot of things,i know, were certain and known for almost everyone there. Times have changed, for reasons mostly given but never too acceptable, everyone has been very busy with their own lives not to take any efforts to be with each other anymore. The usual Christmas reunions have gone and it was rueful to finally meet up with relatives on such a given situation. Almost everyone would share how they regret not being there for Kuya Arby, I was but that wouldn't change the fact that most of us weren't. This could have been the saddest Christmas, but it will be unwise reliving the same mistakes, most of us cousins have committed to stay in touch before I went back here in Manila, hopefully everyone would. Ending, it was still a memorable reunion, and just today, I received greetings from the cousins I have long waited to share the Christmas spirit with.
Christmas still is a gratifying season in spite of the things that have happened. I just wish that where ever my cousin is, He's happy that there are good things and bondings that came about from us mourning for Him. To my cousins, Have a very Merry Christmas, to everyone too, make sure time's well spent with your loveones this Christmas. After all, you can always make everyday your Christmas day.
